STIs: When Sex Positivity Isn't All that Positive
Sex positivity is on the rise.
Conversations surrounding contraception choices and abortion are increasingly headlining media outlets and sparking movements; Casual sex and serial dating are normalizing in society. However, the continued vilification and demoralization of folks contracting sexually transmitted infections (STIs) showcases how much work there is to be done. The daunting image of STIs is surprising given their ubiquity: 50% of sexually active people will have at least one STI by age 25 – HPV being the most common. This statistic follows the upward trend of STI rates in Canada over the last decade.
Still the question remains: why do we stigmatize the potential outcomes of having sex? Why does an STI contraction raise eyebrows and garner glares, but getting the flu solicits sympathy and help? Are they not both products of a natural interaction?
The stigmatisation, shame and fear surrounding STIs affects everyone. The thought of contracting a life-long infection is unsettling. As well, the post-STI diagnosis labelling of sexually active folks (often except for heterosexual cis-gender men) as dirty or promiscuous serves no benefit in easing that burden. The targeted usage of negative language by friends, partners, and society all perpetuate the stigmatization of STIs. In the age of the internet, perpetuation of negative language and ideas is made easier by the anonymity of individuals and collectives, empowering them to be hurtful without fear of consequence. The stigma around STIs is compounding for those folks already facing prejudice because of gender identity, race and/or sexual orientation, ultimately increasing the difficulty of sparking conversations about prevention and testing.
If we are ashamed of STIs and, more importantly, ashamed of how we contract them, then we will not seek out regular testing and treatment, and we will avoid seeking supportive resources.
Shame and lack of information can lead to rises in STI transmission. Many cases of chlamydia and HPV, the most common STIs in Canada, are asymptomatic. That means an individual may pass it on to a/multiple sexual partner(s) unknowingly, which could lead to future health complications if they are not properly identified and treated promptly.
If you do live with an STI or the ramifications of one, consider consulting a therapist to help you navigate through the complex emotions that surround this. Living with an STI and having a healthy, “normal” sex life do not have to be separate concepts.
Sparking the conversation with your partner(s) about how to practice safe sex and when to get tested will help contribute to the normalizing of sexual health in our society, reducing both stigmatization and shame surrounding one of our most natural functions!
If you’ve recently received a positive diagnosis of any STI, you aren’t alone – we can help you work through the shame and feel confident once again! An STI diagnosis isn’t a death sentence for your sex life, our counsellors and sex therapists have helped folks just like you find healing through the stigma, and continue to have the best sex lives of their life. Ready to reach out? Contact us today for a free 15-minute phone consultation with one of our team members!